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Hi Mara,
I think the critiques that you've otten so far are excellent. I have only a few things to add.
The lighting is very flat and frontal, as though you used a flash to take the reference photo. Regardless of whether a flash was actually used, this is the impression, and if your goal is to create a portrait with depth and three-dimensionality, then I recommend avoiding this kind of lighting. There are many threads on this forum that deal with lighting.
Your friends are right--there is really little information in this portrait on who you really are. I am left with the impression that you are hiding behind a glamorous facade and don't really want people to know who you are! Excuse me for being blunt! But I have a feeling there is a lot under the surface. I would like to see you paint a portrait that shows you as a human being, one that reveals who you are.
Alex
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