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This is a lovely drawing. Older people make great portraits in my opinion because there is so much to render. What I would do, following Jimmie's advice, is to really, really squint down and see the shapes of the values. I think if you brought up the lightest sides of the whole form, forehead, nose, cheek, neck and shirt you will like the dark background better. And I would darken the ear which is in shadow.
It is a beautiful drawing. You have really captured this gentleman and he will love it even if you don't change it from it's current state.
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