My first in many years - in progress!

[Mike McCarty]

Beth,

I'm not good at giving advice on how to correct art, therefore I don't critique much. I will, however, offer some conceptual advice.

I'm a fan of Will Shakespeare. In the play Romeo and Juliet, Friar Lawrence picks a small flower from his garden and remarks: "Within the infant rind of this small flower Poison hath residence, and medicine power: For this, being smelt, with that part cheers each part, Being tasted, slays all senses with the heart." I guess this is my normal obtuse way of saying that a mere suggestion (smell) can be better than a full taste.

It

[Timothy C. Tyler]

Mike,

That was the most apt and lovely reply I've yet read. Lovely.

Respectfully yours,

Tim

[Elizabeth Schott]

Thanks guys!

Tim,

Do you mean I should "gray" down the background with some brown? Sorry if that is a real blonde statement.

Mike,

You should critique more often. Not only are you poetic, you sized me up just right. I do work too close; in fact I have not found the right eyes to use. Distance, computer or reading strength. This is especially hard when there is a model in the room too.

I understand your "less is more" analogy with Will Shakespeare. Yet I felt if I was going to do my first oil in ages, I didn

[Lon Haverly]

Great job! I like it.

I do think you need to work on the leg on the right. It appears to be too short and undefined. Perhaps if you were to paint the whole knee, it would actually extend beyond the canvas border.

Also, consider lighter colors on the hand on our right, which is in the shadow. Since you have decreased the darker values in the rest of the image, this hand, too, might want to be a tiny bit lighter.

The face is great. I would not do anything more if I were you. You were able to work out the ochre out of the middle of the face, which probably showed up more on the computer than in life. It is a help to see your work on the computer, as the digital reproduction is very telling. It helps you to see errant color values that otherwise might go unnoticed.

I hope you are encouraged to paint more. I greatly respect all the people who have critiqued here. You cannot go wrong by heeding their advice.

[Mai Ly]

Very nice Beth!

Mai

[Mari DeRuntz]

Your revisions already make the piece more powerful! Now I see a clear purple/yellow complementary scheme, which is visually calming, and echoes the sitter's quiet pose.

This is something I'm also addressing in my own work: everything you put on the canvas is to support the portrait. Your passion is contagious, by the way, I'm off to paint!

[Elizabeth Schott]

Mud is not always bad. A little here and there blended into your colors will knock down that intensity. You have pure color figured out and that's a good thing.

Hey Tim,

While doing a little research, I was amazed to see how much "mud" Mary Cassatt uses in her backgrounds

I did have an art teacher that told me that no matter what road I travel, to never give up my boldness with color. I have always been very loud. Some people would say in more ways than just one!

[Peter Jochems]

Hello,

I would like to make a few comments. I think it has been said before in this thread but her left arm (for us left) is painted too much to the left, I placed green dots to show where the edge of the arm should be.

The form of the eye on the left (for us left) needs some attention, especially the area closest to the nose. I'm not saying she looks cross-eyed, but in her eyes is not the rest that I see in the photograph.

The left eye is placed a little too high also, this way her face loses something of the monumental quality the pose has in the source photograph.

Her left eyebrow differs a little from how it is placed in the source photograph. On the painting her expression looks a little annoyed because of that, while she has a friendlier expression in the source photograph.

You placed the hairs which fall in her face too much to the left, and the little piece of skin which we see left of that hair in the source photograph is painted too much to the left also, which gives the cheeck a strange form.

Making the shadow on the right side of her face (where her ear is) sharper and a little darker will improve the likeness, I think.

You placed the hairline a little too high, therefore her forehead is a little too high and too dominant.

The hair on the left is painted as a little too broad in volume, but this could work.

Special attention needs to be given to the way the light falls on the nose. In the painting the nose appears broken to me, sorry. The lighted area is in the source photograph more to the left.

Her left cheek is painted a little too large.

I hope these comments will help you improve the painting. It's a lovely piece, and I'm looking forward to see the end result.

Greetings,

Peter

[Elizabeth Schott]

Thanks Peter,

Unfortunately I did not see your critique earlier today, since I was a busy bee painting. As for the arm, I appreciate your pointing that out, I did not notice it. I still need to compare, but I am afraid I am too far along to fix that. Maybe this is not true in oils.

I had not done any detail in her hair at your last viewing, so hopefully I have corrected that and some of your other concerns.

Here is the progress as of this evening:

[Elizabeth Schott]

This is the detail of her face and hair. I did work on the eyes, so hopefully she is better.