Ribbons

Simon Bland · 04-25-2006, 07:25 PM

The feedback I got from my last thread was so helpful that I made a promise to myself that I would post all off this year's non-animal portraits for critique. Since then, of course, I've seen all the really breathtaking work that's been posted over the winter so now I think I need serious help!

The girls are sitting on and in front of their fireplace (the same one that the portrait will be hung over).

I used natural lighting for the photos that I based this painting on, aided by reflection from a large piece of white foamcore. It was a cold March afternoon.

One thing that was different about this portrait that previous ones I've painted was the large amount of time I spent putting together color charts - but it really paid off when I went back to touch up or add glazes.

This is 24x30 oil on linen (acrylic primed). I'd love any feedback you can provide..

Thanks !

Simon

Allan Rahbek · 04-27-2006, 07:06 PM

Simon,
I think that you have a fine composition, a triangle placed a little off the centre and balanced by the red wall. The light on the big girls head and hair is very fine and so is the edges and the dogs are just lovely.

I have a couple of suggestions.:
The right eyes of both girls (our left side) looks a bit flat, as if they were not rounded (eyeballs) .
The blue sweater could need more distinct light and shadow areas. Now, I think, that it is a medium value blue.
The upper edge of the leg's are totally horizontal, which I find is too much of a repetition of the lines in the wall and floor.
Also the red brick wall would benefit if you broke up the red and the mortar stripes with some neutrals to make it less isolated as a color.

Finally, for now

, I would suggest to soften the shadow side of the sleeve, at the far left, to make the edge almost disappear.

Allan

Ilaria Rosselli Del Turco · 04-27-2006, 07:23 PM

Dear Simon,
I really like this work. It reminds me a lot of David Hockney's work.
At first sight I thought that somehow the surfaces of the house are very bare, but the more I look at it the more I enjoy the simplicity of the tile pattern, and its taking discretely part to the economy of the painting.
I find the composition very interesting and the direction of the glazes adds to the liveliness of the work.
If I have to identify areas that to me need retouching that would be the arm of the lower girl, which reads right as for the shape, but maybe needs a better rendering of the folds; also perhaps you could find some straight lines in the knees of the other girl, to me they look too round and need a slight indication of the structure.
I see Allan has been faster than me, we were writing at the same time! Allan, go to bed it's past Midnight.
I'll go too, Simon many compliments
Ilaria

Alexandra Tyng · 04-27-2006, 08:08 PM

Simon,

Nice composition and color arrangement. I think this works well in the abstract. The way you've placed the girls and dogs seems relaxed and natural, and I like their expressions.

The one thing (not to disagree with the previous suggestions, which are excellent) that stands out for me is the flatness of the light part of the girls' faces. There seems to be very little sculpting of form and variation of color. I would expect to see more light and color, and areas of highlight, in the light areas.

Alex

Simon Bland · 04-27-2006, 08:30 PM

Allan: Great observations, even from the stinky photos I took. I am going to take up all of your suggestions and see what happens. Thanks !

Ilaria: Thank you for your compliments. I grew up in Yorkshire not far from David Hockney's birthplace, but that's the only thing I have in common with him ! I agree with you on the arm - I think it comes across as being too heavy (perhaps massive is the right word) and some more careful painting would address that.

Alex: Thanks for your kind comments. You have hit on the one thing that's been really troubling me (perhaps I should have put this in the WIP section instead?). I think I should be able to correct this in a few hours but I'm also scratching my head on the best way to treat the edge of the face that is lit. It looks too harsh as it is, however I'm worried that softening the edge is not the right thing to do. Any suggestions ?

Simon

Ilaria Rosselli Del Turco · 04-28-2006, 07:58 AM

Simon, regarding the edge of the face I think you could try and lighten the tone of the hair, and while at it try treating the edge by adding a strip of higher chroma, that will account for the plan of the face that turns away from us.
I know this will put you in danger of having to repaint the whole face though!
Ilaria

Alexandra Tyng · 04-28-2006, 09:14 AM

Or you could try to find more color in the parts of the face not on the edge. For instance, the transitions between nose and cheek, mouth and cheek, around the bottom of the eye socket where it meets the upper cheek. I would expect to see more going on in the planes of the nose also. You can leave the (our) right edge of the cheek as it is for now--unless at the end you find it needs adjustment.

Allan Rahbek · 04-28-2006, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Simon Bland

One thing that was different about this portrait that previous ones I've painted was the large amount of time I spent putting together color charts - but it really paid off when I went back to touch up or add glazes.
Simon

Simon,

What did you do with the color charts, what is the function ?

I have seen that some painters test the colors they plan to use, by painting them on pieces of paper and hang them on the painting, before they apply the paint, is that what you did ?

Allan

Simon Bland · 04-28-2006, 06:19 PM

Allan,

I've started creating color charts like the one I attached below to help me get the color and value of paint on the canvas to match the color and value of that which I'm trying to paint and also to get me to be more creative with my color choices.

I have a small book on color mixing that I used to use as a reference, but it was of limited help because the colors didn't exactly match those of my oil paints.

To create my own: I mix as many different combinations of two colors as I think are useful (six in the sample below, but often just two or three) and then tint with two different amounts of another paint (white in this case, but I've also done this using yellows and blues to get greys and neutrals).

Rather than do new color charts for each painting I've decided to build up a library of color charts as I go along. As I design a painting I make a note of the colors I'm going to use and the position on the color chart using a grid reference (yes, I know it's really nerdy).

I've used Art Spectrum Colorfix which is an acrylic primed pastel paper that accepts oil paint as I had a bunch of the stuff lying around. I cut a 22"x28" sheet into three pieces as it's easier to handle that way. I decided against using mylar as I wasn't sure the paint would stick to it for any length of time.

While I'm painting I hang them up near to my easel so that I can refer to them as needed and as I mix paint I put a bit on my palette knife and reach over to compare.

Hope that helps.

Simon

Simon Bland · 04-28-2006, 06:31 PM

Alen and Ilaria,

I've been working on the painting all day and just came across your replies - thank you!

In the end I used an interference red in the most prominent areas of the cheek and chin and it served to soften the edge beautifully.

A couple of additional things to do, probably on Sunday, and I re-post the picture. I'm amazed what a big difference some of the changes have already made.

I am in your debt.

Simon