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Old 01-09-2006, 05:09 AM   #1
Marcus Lim Marcus Lim is offline
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Hi Pamela,
I personally find this image very heartwarming, and you must have enjoyed working on it. The poses and colors were well captured, without stifling the child's natural energy in your paintings.

What i thought would heighten this innocent energy would be to lighten / lessen the facial tones for the boy in red, and the toddler. I'm especially referring to the red cheeks on both kids, which seems to be making them look older right now.

Another thing we can do is to tone down on the toddler's eyes which seem to be having the whites of the eyes outstanding right now. In my experience, a toddler around this age would have very little eye whites.
So i hope with my two cent's worth, it'll be helpful to making it a remarkable painting.
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Old 01-09-2006, 08:42 AM   #2
Pamela Scherf Pamela Scherf is offline
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Previous photos too saturated

Dear Marcus,
I've changed the photos. These are nearer to the actual painting than the others were. They had too much red in and I hadn't realized. Thanks for bringing it to my attention. Do you think they still have too much red in their cheeks now? I also put in the original photo off my computer. I thought I had lost it so I had scanned in the print out which came out a different colour. Also the one year old does have whites showing in his eyes as I had checked with a photo given me by the client.
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Old 01-09-2006, 09:53 AM   #3
Alexandra Tyng Alexandra Tyng is offline
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Hi Pamela,

Could you post a closeup of the reference photos? This would be very helpful to me with my middle-aged vision.
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Old 01-09-2006, 07:16 PM   #4
Pamela Scherf Pamela Scherf is offline
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Photo close up

Dear Alexandra,
Here is a close up of the photo. I hope it helps.
Pamela
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Old 01-09-2006, 07:37 PM   #5
Alexandra Tyng Alexandra Tyng is offline
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Pamela,

Thanks so much for the closeup. It's a lovely grouping of the three brothers, and I like the asymmetry of their positions. You really show their relationship, which is essential in a group portrait.

I wanted to see the closeup because I noticed that in your painting you have intensified the value contrast in their faces, resulting in a slightly old-mannish look, especially in the youngest and the boy to our left. Marcus's comment about the whites of the eyes is part of this, I think. In the photo, the values in the eye area, for instance, are more all-of-a-piece. Same with the mouth area, where you have exaggerated the contrast in the lines around the mouth, the contrast between the teeth, the darkness behind them, the lips, etc. The teeth become too "separate" although they may be accurately shaped. These areas stand out the most to me. When there is too much value contrast, it can be frustrating trying to get a likeness; you may feel "something is off" even though you have measured the proportions accurately.

Alex
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Old 01-09-2006, 08:14 PM   #6
Pamela Scherf Pamela Scherf is offline
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Thanks Alexandra,
I'll have another look at it. I see what you mean. I suppose I was trying to bring out the features too much to please the client. It was really hard working with such close values in this lighting. I didn't like the shadows under the eyes and the client went on about the blue in the eyes of the boys on the left that I emphasised this a tad so I think I went a bit far with the contrasts.
Pamela
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Old 01-10-2006, 11:27 PM   #7
Chris Saper Chris Saper is offline
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Dear Pamela,

In addition to the excellent comments you have already received, I would add a couple of thoughts, the main one having to do with the composition - it may just be something that you'd consider in future paintings.

I think that we "buy" things, visually in photographs that we don't so easily accept in paintings - there are five chopped off limbs going into the sand pile. They act as visual arrows pulling the viewer's eye away from the kids' faces. There is also the area on our left where the boy's swimsuit, right below the red shirt edge, might be so close to the edge of the painting, so that when it is in a frame, you will get a tangent where the red shirt ends, also attracting the viewer's eye. The way to deal with the compositional questions, I think is to work out three value thumbnails before you begin so that you can see where you want to place different values to support your center of interest. Edge tangents are usually easy to fix, just put the painting into the frame to see how far the rabbet of the frame encroaches on the image, then adjust whatever you need to.

I think you made good decisions to call out more edges in the faces, but you might think about knocking down everything but the most important edges. The clothing has lots of equally sharp edges that are attention grabbers. The area where the red-shirt boy's hair and the toddler's hair touches is a little confusing as well.

Lastly, the colors in the clothing don't seem as well integrated as they could be - by sharing some color in adjacent shapes and areas, the colors will become more cohesive.

Good luck - this is a very ambitious painting!
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