Okay, I'm going to try to more specific on how this affected me, I don't want people taking things the wrong way.
My disappointment was based on thinking I had won with one piece, then finding out I had won with the other. For over a week, I was excited about winning with my first pastel. I was very surprised to find out it was for a drawing. If I were the judge, I would'nt have chosen the drawing. I
do like the drawing, I swear! My paranoia had me believing that people looking at my drawing were thinking "that won!?" No one actually said it, I was just torturing myself.
The president said he liked the drawing, he just implied that he would have chosen something else. He did'nt critique it, I was grateful for his honesty. I don't think it's a matter of people just being nice by giving compliments, but when they told me it was a very nice drawing, they did'nt look sincere.
When I post here, it's great to hear compliments, but I'd also love to hear if there's anything that bothers them about it. That's why I do the WIP postings, to see if anyone picks something up before I finish. Ya know, I understand I can be whiny but my BIGGEST problem is not seeing what everyone else is seeing. I may look at a finished piece and wonder
why would someone else like it?
Why would someone want this to hang on their wall? I feel funny hanging them on my own wall.
I'm always looking to improve, to add maturity to my work, I can't settle, I simply want to be happy with it. I don't know how to do it.
So I'm sorry if anyone didn't understand my complaining and disappointment. I'm over it and am proud to have won. I'm now telling people that I've won (without guilt).
And again, thanks to everyone who has replied, it has meant a lot to me.
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