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I would strongly recommend against taking out the hand and trying to invent the lighting and forms that are behind it (chin, neck, collar, etc). That would be an invitation for major headaches and greatly increasing the likelihood that you will be unhappy with the result, in my opinion.
I agree with you that including his trombone would take away from the idea that these are meant to be matching portraits, and I agree with Chuck's suggestion that they be facing each other. When it comes time to paint your son with his trombone I would include more of it so we know what it is. Looks like some mystery brass instrument to my musically uneducated eye, right now.
Of the two remaining photos I like the one with greater contrast between light and dark sides of his face.
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