Stephanie and Teddy

[Marvin Mattelson]

Michelle I think you did a beautiful job. I offer a few suggestions for your consideration.

I think the rim light emanating from the painting's left side needs to be lowered in value. It is pulling the shadow side of the form forward and flattening the painting. This is especially true for the rim light on the column that dissects the girl's head. Less contrast in background elements mirrors reality. The left side of the boy's shirt is very distracting also. Secondary light sources (including reflected light) are better handled with hue changes and subtle value changes. Thus you can clarify planes without interfering with the solidity of form.

The right edge of her skirt is lighter than the side plane, again flattening out the form. It should be darker (turning away from the light).

Its good that you are playing more with your edges, however, I feel they are too much the same. Edges should constantly vary. Look at Bouguereau! When forms get softer, turn away, or go behind other forms the edge takes a softer turn. They should occasionally blur with surrounding forms to create atmosphere. Think lost and found.

It would have been very easy for you to submit it to the Unveilings section.

Overall a good job, but I know where you want to go and these are some of the keys to the next level.

[Michele Rushworth]

Thanks, Marvin, for yor tips, especially the suggestion about needing greater variety in my edges.

I was wondering what you meant by the title of your post "Going Up". Can you clarify that for me?

[Elizabeth Schott]

composition is just a tad stilted

Michele, you and Michael might agree with your statement, but when I look at this wonderful painting I remember someone -- I believe it was Peggy -- saying something like, one person is a portrait, but with two people you paint a relationship.

This one shouts brother and sister to me. (I hope that is what they are.) At this age, they would be a little standoffish from each other.

[Marvin Mattelson]

"Going up!" shouts the elevator operator on each floor as his elevator is about to ascend. It alludes to my assumption of your desire to take it to the next level.

[Michele Rushworth]

Ahh... Thanks!

[Michele Rushworth]

Thanks again to everyone who posted suggestions and to those who kindly said that this painting could have easily gone in the "unveiling" section instead.

While I think my work is pretty good, I know it's a far cry from great and can always use improvement. That's why you'll usually see my latest creations in this section instead of under unveilings. I know I can always get better and I value your advice!