Critique

[Daniel Arredondo]

Please critique for composition, value, color and drawing. Thanks.

[David Dowbyhuz]

Beautiful work, Daniel.

The cool background nicely compliments the fiery hair. I especially like your treament there.

I have a picky problem with her left earring, only because the right one is so well rendered, and the left doesn't measure up. (Doesn't even appear to be the same size?)

The painting is still wonderful.

[Daniel Arredondo]

David;

Thank you for your reply, you are giving me exactly what I need. I agree with your comment.

Daniel

[Mary Sparrow]

I do agree with the left earring not looking proportionate to the right, but other than that I think it is very nice! What a beautiful subject, she must be pleased!

[Cynthia Daniel]

I really like your portrait Daniel. It's beautifully painted and the colors really sing. I think the colors take some daring. It's beautiful!

[Steven Sweeney]

A very stunning rendition, excellent draftsmanship in the facial features, brilliant treatment of the hair. This woman has personality -- so much so that I'm finding it difficult to stop looking at "her" and consider the piece as a portrait.

My observations concern mostly the pose and the background. The model looks just a little too upright, too rigid, given the casualness of her sitting somewhat sideways in the chair with her arm draped over the chair back, a posture that I would expect to see inducing at least some slight curvature in the torso from a slight lean, a shift in weight onto that supporting arm. The slightly awkward, vertical "dangle" of the other arm adds to this stiffness. You might have that arm on the viewer's left do some compositional work by bringing that hand as well up to the chair back, resting underneath the other hand. This would, I think, have a number of benefits, including shifting the model's "weight" more toward the area of the chair that she's using for support; filling up some of that fairly large and quiet area below the bustline and providing an opportunity to introduce some darker shadows on the underside of that arm, which would help "frame" the head and shoulders area; and creating a pleasing triangular framework (head to elbow to hands) to bring emphasis to bear on your center of focus.

I think you could also use your background to greater effect in setting off and framing the subject, by letting the light source focus on the model and pass through to the area on the viewer's left. This means that the background on the right side would be significantly graded to become at the edge of the painting as dark as you now have the far left side. And the left side, which is being influenced by the same side lighting as the model, would be very much lighter than you have it. I think that darkening the right side of the background would also lend some weight to it, to help balance the model's position over on the left side of the portrait space. (And the slight shift in pose suggested earlier would help in that regard as well, shifting the model's balance a bit more away from the left edge.)

A few more random observations:

--Judging from intensity of the shadows elsewhere, it seems that the shadows in the fabric folds of the dress, particularly below and to the left of the bustline, would be darker, which I believe would give more form as well to this part of the figure.

--The vertical shadow extending upward from the armpit on the left goes a little too high and is a bit too dark; it doesn't seem necessary to describe either an anatomical feature or a likely fold or bunching of fabric in that area (though that would change if you have her bring her cross the hand of that arm over to the chair back).

--I think it would be interesting for the chair back material to be a hue different from the background. With the model's focus being straight on to the viewer, a pose that demands attention to the eyes and face, you could even get away with a bit of a pattern in that fabric, subdued but suggestive of richer furnishings.

--The reflected light on the edge of the shadow side of the face seems inconsistent with an absence of such light on, say, the hair or the dress fabric.

--If you leave the arm on the left as is, I'd suggest at least moving it off vertical, either way, so that it isn't parallel to the side of the picture.

Hope some of this is useful or at least seems worth considering.

Best of luck.

Steven

[Daniel Arredondo]

Steven;

You are very observant, with some good suggestions. Thank you!
Daniel

[Timothy C. Tyler]

Firstly, I like that the earrings being "not the same." The one is great and that's enough great earrings in one painting! The hand is fine and delicate and the face is well done too. You do the hardest stuff best! The hair is strong and pushes the envelope (on my screen anyway) but it is strong I'm sure. I do think less is more with backgrounds and even clothes--less chroma maybe? The skin tones sing now. Take out a bit of color from the dress and the background and these (the skin tones) will glow! even more.