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-   -   Graphite portrait for Critique (http://portraitartistforum.com/showthread.php?t=965)

Frank Samos 07-01-2002 03:50 PM

Graphite portrait for critique
 
1 Attachment(s)
Michael,

Here is a portrait I completed for a friend. It is open to the Forum for critique and suggestions.

Thank you in advance for your input.

Sincerely,
Frank

Michael Georges 07-01-2002 05:20 PM

Hello Frank:

Very nice portrait. I think the head area is the strongest. Nice lighting on the form; you captured the hair very nicely. You have expressed a pretty good understanding of value and how light rolls over the form to create highlight and shadow.

Now for the critique:

Her eyes look appropriately set back into her head, though the eyebrows might be just a little dark. She appears to have fair hair, like blonde or light brown - yes? The eyebrows don't appear to match her hair values. Very nice lost edges around the ear and points where the hair meets the background and the opposite side of her shirt. The shadowed nasal-labial crease (the little crease that goes from the edges of your nose around your mouth) is too dark and makes the area look too deeply set. Further, if you added more values between the highlight on the cheek and the shadow of the crease it will make the cheek turn better and look more round. Nice reflected light on the underside of the nostrils. I might bring some higher values in to the highlighted area of the forehead, again to make it look rounder and turn better. The cast shadow from her head that falls on her shoulder will be darker where it meets the hair and lighten as it falls away from the head. The edge will be sharper closer and soften as it falls away too.

Her lower half needs some work. Her arms appear to terminate too high and her bustline also appears too high. Remember, the arms are cylinders, so they need to appear round. Make your value transitions longer and softer to make the form of the arm look more round. The bump you have represented is the Acromion-clavicle joint, the spot where the clavicle protrudes out of the shoulder. You need more surrounding values otherwise it looks like a spot.

The torso and the shirt are cylinders too. As the shirt rolls into her arm, it will get darker. Let the reflected light on her arm define the edge. I might put some higher values into the shirt as well to make it look like a white shirt, but that may just be the scan. Nice turn on the collar of the shirt. It looks pooched out.

From a composition standpoint, she is slightly off-center, which is good. Again, this may just be the scan, but I would put a couple more inches above her head. Where to end the form is a difficult choice. You have to take it past the bustline for it to not make the figure look cut off...good choice. I might make it more abstract closer to the bottom, which is the place to leave strokes and rough shaded areas. Finally, IMO, you should not sign on the form itself as it messes with the illusion. Sign down on the lower corner of the page - again, my opinion.

I hope that helps! Again, a nice piece. :)

Lon Haverly 07-02-2002 04:39 AM

I am in awe of all of Michael's work and expertise, and agree with his masterful critiques.

I also like the mood of this drawing, the use of highlight in the hair and the shadows on the face.

The collar bones seem too high. The line technique in the eyes is weak. Since they are nearly the only dark lines in the drawing, they need to be very expressive and drawn with some flare. Here, the lines are flat, even though they are dark. Lines can be used to give emphasis and expression. This is sometimes achieved by the way in which you sharpen your lead. A chiseled point of the pencil sharpened on a sandpaper can give the maximum control and dispatch of the point of a pencil, especially where features are concerned. Perhaps some studies in the individual elements of the face (eyes, nose etc.) and the kinds of lines that compose them would be helpful.

Overall, a very pleasing effect.

Frank Samos 07-02-2002 10:37 AM

Lon and Michael,

Thank you both for your critique and suggestions. I will most definitely work on the areas you have pointed out. I believe some more working from life is very much in order here in the immediate future.

Again, my sincere gratitude for your words.

Frank Samos

Chris Saper 07-02-2002 11:12 AM

Hi Frank,

When I am working in a shadowed area, I always check three things to make sure what I am painting STAYS in the shadow. In comparison to areas in light, shadows should show less contrast, softer edges and (although not relevant here) less saturated color.

Best wishes!

Rebecca Willoughby 07-03-2002 06:43 PM

Frank,

I will give you my husband's words of wisdom when I ask him to critique a drawing for me, "So far so good!"

Being the Photoshop junkie that I am, I always run a piece of transparency through my ink jet with the face of my subject the exact same size as it appears on my drawing. When you lay it directly over your work you can find little problems and correct them. So in this piece (assuming you are working from a reference photo) you would convert the drawing to gray scale and this would help you with the values as well.

Just a little technical info.

Rebecca


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