Zack
 

Critiques welcome....
This is a commissioned pencil piece. Zack kept wanting to lean back in his chair, and tilt his head. One of those shots had the expression Mom liked best. She preferred another shot for the neckline. Since I kept the lighting similar, I rotated his head a bit and placed it in the other better neckline. The photo is the rotated head shot.
My main concern is the shadow area. Should I add more, especially in the lower right half of the chin?

Hi Jullie:

Do you mind if I make few observations aside from your shadow concerns?

This is a reference photo that requires a lot of squinting. By squinting you can see immediately the shape of the darkest shadows and forms. When I do a squint comparison between your drawing and the reference photo I see a number of important differences:

The shape of his right eye in the photo appears rounder where as your eye lid drops down appearing triangular. (Also check the distance between his eye's and brows)

The shadow of his right cheek has a distinct oval footprint which I don't see in your drawing.

Check the mouth and the dark shape that separates the lips.

The jaw line area although appearing to make a dip in the photo is in reality a more subtle curve. By exaggerating that curve, he appears a little caricaturish.

I also question the altering of his collar line. The gesture of a young man with a self confident grin seems lost by this alteration.

Hope this has been helpful.

:)

Nicely done Julie,
What caught me first before looking at the reference is I don't get the sense that he is making eye contact, don't know if anyone else agrees. The eye socket area looks very dark in the ref, but still appears to make contact.
Other than what's already been said, fine drawing that requires little amount of fiddling to get just right.

Thanks
 

Thanks, everyone -

I will make changes and then post again, this time with a bigger photo as reference.

I'm stuck with the neckline change. I'll chalk it off as a learning experience - first, that I need to watch carefully, and make sure my subject doesn't slouch. And, if he does, consider whether to show that photo to my client!

Zack revised
 

Well, here it is again.
I've darkened the shadows, and tried to fix the items previously mentioned. Please let me know how it's coming. Thanks!