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-   -   Pick this apart for me? (http://portraitartistforum.com/showthread.php?t=3932)

Karen Barton 03-04-2004 05:43 PM

Is this better?
 
1 Attachment(s)
I had to wipe out the hills behind her completely and start over. Do they recede enough?

Chris Saper 03-04-2004 06:08 PM

Yes, there's a much better sense of distance now.

Karen Barton 03-04-2004 06:34 PM

Thank you Sharon, and Chris!

I agree!! It was worth the trouble for sure. I have learned a valuable lesson! Thanks so much!!

Sharon Knettell 03-04-2004 06:56 PM

Bravery!
 
I agree with Chris, however,at the left bottom of the hills there is a rather sharp brown line, soften it as it makes the hills look somewhat detached from the water and floating. I think you could also scumble a tad more of the sky color over the hills to lighten them up a bit. All in all a good job overall!

Leslie Ficcaglia 03-04-2004 07:53 PM

Karen, I think it's a much stronger painting now. I agree completely with Chris and Sharon that the background was competing too much with the child. As you have it now, minus that brown separating line, it creates a lovely mood and allows the viewer to focus on the child within a landscape, but not dominated by it. Nice work!

Karen Barton 03-05-2004 03:01 PM

From good to great!
 
2 Attachment(s)
I think it has improved so much. I am really grateful for the help with it. I fixed the dark line on the left. One last photo of the finished product. Do you see anything about the baby that could be improved?

Michele Rushworth 03-06-2004 11:56 AM

Can't see anything about the baby that I'd change at first glance but what does jump out at me is the bottom ellipse of the bucket. It doesn't match the top ellipse of the bucket opening.

Karen Barton 03-06-2004 12:13 PM

The bucket
 
That's not hard to fix. The bucket has been kind of like an afterthought next to all the other elements. I noticed yesterday after I photographed it that it looks pinched where she is holding the bucket , so I have fixed that. I am usually pretty aware of elipses and it bugs me when I see the "elipse" mistake in artwork. Thanks for the heads up. Karen


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