Juli in window

Will Enns · 02-01-2003, 04:25 AM

During a recent visit to New Orleans, I became very excited about painting/drawing some of the marvelous architecture which is such a rich part of the history in that area. Most notable were some residences on St. Charles Street, and they filled a good many rolls of my film.

As I flipped through the snaps the other day in search of a subject, I came across one home that was more ornately decorated than all the others, kind of like Tammy Faye Baker. I was immediately compelled to draw it, an endeavor which defeated me utterly.

So I flipped onward, and came across this image of a round window, which incidentally resides on the second story of that same home, off on one side.

While the window by itself scarcely justified its presence in my photo library, I thought a person looking out of it would add a nice intrigue.

The girl is my daughter Juli, aged seven at the time I took her photo, and I just dropped her in behind the window without asking the owners.

I would be thankful for commentary or suggestions on the composition in general, as this is a test to see how well the composition would work if I painted it bigger. Digital manipulation won't offend me.

It's 11 x 14", watercolor.

Will Enns · 02-01-2003, 04:27 AM

Detail

Enzie Shahmiri · 02-04-2003, 02:37 AM

Hi Will,

I share your love for architecture and I liked your idea of placing the girl in the window. However, the angle of the window and the stern look on the girls face make the painting reminiscent of something one would see as a book illustration, rather than a traditional portrait. If your intention is to tell a story then the image works, but as a portrait it is unsettling.

If you are planning to rework the image my first recommendation would be to do some sketches to work out the composition. If you keep the angle of the window, I would have the girl look down with a friendlier expression. Or change the angle so it is level with the viewer.

If you read about the pope's picture on SOG, you will notice that the angle in which the sitter is depicted conveys a certain message to the viewer. Decide what that message is and change position and expression of the girl accordingly.

Have fun experimenting with different angles!

Will Enns · 02-08-2003, 01:47 AM

Enzie,

Thank you for taking the time to respond. Your suggestions are good, every one.

I've repainted the entire picture; whether it is an improvement, no one around here is certain, but my wife insisted on framing this one, much to my surprise.

I was quite interested in your comment about a stern look, found it surprising, and am uncertain what it means. I thought the girl was about as stern as the Mona Lisa (although the resemblence ends there.)

As for the story, it is simple, but the clues are subtle. There is a window with relief castings of fierce guards on either side of it, and a casting of a defenceless child in between at the bottom. It seems reasonable to me that the child looking out might be an older iteration of the center casting, and that the guards were diligent in thier duty.

OK, so it's not much of a story, but it's the best I can come up with on short notice.

Perhaps you're right that this isn't ideal as a portrait since it started out as a picture of a window, and I added the girl for the human interest element.

Thanks again for your response.

(As a minor matter of interest, I drew the ovals that form the window freehand without any devices, tricks, or techniques. I'm proud of that, but only a little, since it is only a matter of minor interest.)

Enzie Shahmiri · 02-08-2003, 02:05 AM

Will,

I like the changes you have made. The chubby cheeks and the hair have softened the girl's appearance. I also like the addition of the plants and the stone work.

How wonderful that your wife took it away to frame it. Sometimes I feel family members can be quite harsh and opinionated in their critique and when one of them actually claims something as theirs, I see as quite a compliment.

Peter Jochems · 02-19-2003, 08:26 AM

Hi Will,

To be honest, I liked the first version the best. It has a certain freshness that was lost later. The composition with the round window was original. Some of that is lost by adding the green leaves and the stones, I think. Also, the painting of the child looks overworked to me in the later version. I'm sorry to be so negative on your changed version of the piece. Maybe something to consider for a second version of the original composition?

Greetings,
Peter

Mike McCarty · 02-19-2003, 10:30 AM

Will,

I think the second version, which I rather like, could be improved if you would crop up from the bottom and reduce a good part of the saturated green. Have a look at this as a square composition.

Will Enns · 02-20-2003, 02:39 AM

Peter,

I don't find your comments negative. You simply respond more strongly to one image than the other, and I am thankful for that. Also, I agree that the face seems overworked in the second, but most people don't seem to notice that. What to make of this?

I think one day I will paint the whole thing again and correct all the errors while creating some new ones. At least my errors are original.

Mike,

Square compositions do seem to resolve a good many problems for you and me, don't they?

That long blank wall troubled me, but how else do you compose for a round window set high in a wall? Your suggestion is the obvious solution, but would I think of it? I didn't get the chance - my wife framed the painting before I even had it finished. I had to peel it out of the frame to put finishing touches on the foliage, which I can now see is still not finished. I wish some clients would get that enthusiastic.

But your suggestion has merit. Here it is square. I've since added some foliage that encroaches on the window moulding. That gives it a little more dimension, and I've desaturated the flowers some. But I'm not about to take it out of the frame again to rescan it, no sirree.