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However if i do get a deposit, it'll be quite a while before i can get work done, because he expects me to discuss with the two professionals and work something out together. Now i can foresee this becoming like another case of the Congress trying to pass a Bill, ding-dong-ing views and disagreements, when your life depends on it!
So here, i'm thinking if it's ethical to collect a deposit from him?
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Yes, ethical and necessary. It shows that you both are serious about working out a solution and getting that piece of artwork made.