[Kimberly Dow]

Mary,

What a timely posting. I was just talking about this with my husband because of my bare-chested boys post. He felt I was being ripped apart pretty harshly. And I have received some private emails from members here who are maybe shy; expressing things like, "keep your chin up," and the like. I have to admit some of that stung a bit, especially since I have been a professional for 16 years, (not specializing in portraits though).

As I explained to my husband though, most of the artists here do very formal work compared to what I was attempting to do in that particular painting. I took that into consideration when reading posts. People here are free to boldly share their opinions. Harsh as some of it seemed, I can see that most of it was true. (I still do not think he is scary. Even though at least 4 of the others used that word!)

With those kind of reactions, no matter how much I liked that painting I had to re-think what I was trying to convey. As with anything else, people all respond in different ways and express themselves with varied degrees of tact. Reading as many posts as I can, I have yet to see any that seemed intentionally mean. At least that is how I have to see it or I would not continue to be here! It seems like the artists here have truly good intentions for helping others.

I hear you about taking the less than perfect reference materials. I knew I would hear that a lot and considered not posting because of it. Learning to be a decent photographer will take a while, not to mention that I need new camera equipment. In the meantime though, the bills need to be paid.

As much as a lot of the artists here will lecture about not taking bad references because it may hurt us later, they HAVE to understand that this is an unsteady income, even if they are highly sucessful now. I have never had a client unhappy, as well. Perhaps a couple of paintings will haunt me later, but I am not going to turn down a less-than-perfect job when if I do (and this has been the choice in the past) I will not be able to buy what I need to keep painting.

Nothing is going to stop me from painting, even my ideals. And I do not see that as being unprofessional. I see it as being very professional because even with the horrible references my clients have been thrilled.

I was nervous knowing I would hear about the bad references, but I truly want to learn more, and that includes how to deal with the bad references because sometimes it is just a fact of life. If there are snobs among us, oh well. It won't stop me and it shouldn't stop you either! Curse at them out loud (we can't hear you) then decide if anything they said was valid.

Some artists seem snobbier than others. I wonder if that helps get more affluent clients? I bet it doesn't hurt. Of course understanding how a person intended a comment to sound is hard when it is typed.

I have met some wonderful artists here who are great, yet still human and sweet. And some whom I am honored even made a response at all. Where else could we get this? I have several I want to take workshops from.

Out of the ones I admire I will go to the kindest ones first, it can only help the nerves! Then I will brave the ones that seem more intimidating. Just for a note, I will attend one of Tim Tyler's workshops first. The ones who are extremely sucessful AND kind just show so much class.