Hello Nathan,
I love the general impression from the portrait, the expression of the face, especially find successful the lighting, a little bit like in the pictures of Rembrandt.
Still some technical points may be
- the ear seems to me a little bit too big, or at least not in perspective comparing the size of the nose.
- the left eye... some problems... It seems to me that sometimes people overdraw their mouth, eyes and so on...
- maybe more poetic treatment of the lines... a pastel after all gives that possibility.
- The treatment of the right cheeks in the shadow part seems to me as if drawn from a photo... even in the shadows we can structuralize things... or may be the passage is too brutal.
- Some tonality problems with the use of the white... we can not have the same white at the eyebrows and in the hair...
- The texture of the surface (apparently you are using the grained part of canson) sometimes gives not a very pleasant effect... are you using pastel pencil or something else? Try the smooth part of the paper.
Best regards, Hope not too be too harsh...