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Julianne,
I had a request once from a woman who wanted me to do her portrait for her husband for his birthday. After taking the reference photos, this lady decided that she was too big in the photos. She wanted me to paint her 30 pounds lighter. I explained to her that I don't "make-up" any of the information in my portraits. She said ok and I assumed that she had come to grips with her perceived weight problem.
She called back a couple of days later and asked if I could maybe use someone else's body and her face from 10 years ago stating that she had lots of professional portraits from which I could work.
Again I declined. At this time she huffed that she was just trying to help me in the first place and that I must not need the money very badly.
I was as polite as I could be and refunded her deposit (I charge 40%). Now, I know that this is obviously a situation that surely everyone would turn down, right? Wrong. Another portrait artist is currently completing the portrait as we speak! Thankfully it will have his name on it and not mine!
I always feel it is best to cut the strings and minimize your losses. You never know how many people will see that work and assume that you can't do your job because it doesn't look anything like the person it is supposed to be! In this business our word of mouth reputation makes or breaks us, so being very polite in your rejection is very important, at least in my humble opinion.
Rebecca
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