Julianne,
I can feel your fears from my own experience. It took me years to be able to accept that the image on my canvas/watercolor paper was not equal to the imagination I had of myself. I dreaded another artist looking at my work.
I imagined people with a knowing glance thinking "this guy's a beginner." It took years of this torture before I could finally allow myself to be seen and embarassed. I can tell you truthfully, I grew more during the past few years with this realization than in all of my art school years, and my years producing art after art school, 18 years all together.
Walt Whitman has a very valuable poem called "Beginners." The poem can be found in Leaves of Grass. I cannot quote it now because it is in my studio. However, the poem teaches of the good fortune that beginners have. The world offers so much to them.
Then I look at myself. I look at Leonardo Da Vinci, and realize that we're all beginners compared to a great one like him. That one realization makes it easier to be a beginner, and I feel more like a member of a group of people working to gain something valuable, than a single man in a world in which people are better or worse than me. I hope this post can help you.
Good luck,
Anthony
